Are you for or against the legalization of the Divorce Bill??

Thursday 30 June 2011

Like A Chameleon

A home that is not filled with constant envision and anxiety.

The realization that a crisis in life creates an opening for change that you might not have ever had.

Deep lessons that have resulted in amazing personal growth with new found confidence and self-esteem.

These three are some pro points in divorce. The first part of getting divorced is that you will feel very depressed and very much regretting what you have done. This is a feeling of loathe towards one’s ex husband and the feeling of insecurity for everyone who have attended your wedding. This is a feeling of hopelessness and there is a presence of guilt and agony. The next step after the mourning stage is A home that is not filled with constant envision and anxiety. You get to build a better home with your children (if there are any) and wit yourself. You get to live in peace and not to worry about everything that is around you. You get to be free, free from stress and anxiety. You get to be free from everything that may be emotionally harassing and you will then discover the realization that a crisis in life creates an opening for change that you might not have ever had. You will discover that you are strong for going through a crisis as such. You will realize how much of a person you are and how much better you deserve. This will make you realize that this crisis is an opening for change and for repent. You will make your life a lot better by being open to changes and by being open to the wonders of life. Life is all about making choices and these choices determine who you are so do not regret what you have chosen to be or what situation you choose to be in, be thankful for you have the opportunity to change everything that has been bothering you for the past few years of living. Psychologically speaking, you get to think that you are a strong person and you are the kind of person that does not bring him/herself down. Because of this, you will be able to determine deep lessons that have resulted in amazing personal growth with new found confidence and self-esteem. Your new found self esteem will be very useful in the future. You will be able to learn that you are a better person without your shaky marriage and you will remain strong and faithful to your decision to live alone and to put yourself first amidst everything that has happened in your marriage that may be very dragging and agonizing.
                These are the wonders in life, the ability of a person to cope up with the situation and the ability of a person to adapt to his/her nature eventually. We are like chameleons who change colors everytime there is an outside force that attacks us for our benefit. We are strong beings and we deserve the best in life. Always remember that divorce will not put you down, for it will make things better for you and your life.




A Very Interesting Comparison

Adam and Eve were given a choice whether or not to eat the forbidden fruit. God forbade them to eat the fruit from the Tree of Life. Adam was hesitant, while Eve was clearly willing to eat the fruit. Even went ahead and ate the fruit, she then, convinced Adam to do so as well. Adam ate the fruit as well, and they were banished from the Kingdom of God.
               
                             This summarized tale of Adam and Eve is found in Genesis, the beginning of the extinction of man. This has been the case in the Old Testament. Clearly, they were both given the choice and the free will to decide for them whether they will do so or not. They chose to eat the fruit, and this has caused man to sin. Why am I saying all these? As a comparison, the forbidden fruit is the Divorce bill, whereas Adam is the husband, eve is the wife, and God is God himself. In our society during the present times, the women are the ones who are willing and who are convincing the masses to eat the forbidden fruit or, in this case, to legalize divorce in the Philippines. What’s odd is that it is truly applicable and truly comparable to the story of Adam and Eve. In the story God stands as the Church and the strong belief in banishment from the Kingdom once a couple commits sin. The “sin” that was being talked about is Divorce. If Eve did not eat the forbidden fruit, man would not be extinct right now, she has fuelled the evolution of man and man’s original sin or we can look upon it as man’s urge to discover life. As of right now, the society views divorce as a moral sin, a grave sin that is not meant to be legalized because of the strong beliefs of the Church. The Church believes in the sanctity of marriage and of all of its sacraments. The Church believes that if a couple results to divorce; they will be committing a moral sin and will be punished for it for the rest of their lives. For the rest of their lives, they will suffer and they will be “banished” from the Church and from the Kingdom of God (figuratively).
               
                        I myself am against divorce, but upon looking at different comments of people and through personal friends that are going through a tough marriage (some of them are forced into it, actually) I have thought about it and I think that Divorce is a very pro-choice law. It solely depends on the couple if they will result to Divorce in order to fix their problems. It is merely a use of the man’s ability to discover the world as a big picture that is meant to be analyzed and to be interpreted. God, in the end, forgave Adam and Eve, this is the case in all of the stories in the Bible. There is a presence of forgiveness. Of course, man should not be lax because there is always forgiveness, what I am saying is that God loves each and everyone of us and I believe that it is only the Church who dictates to us what is exactly in the Bible, but our relationship with God is more than just written messages from the old and new testament, it is all about forgiveness and all about choice and being a good servant of God.
Opinionated

Monday 27 June 2011

The Parent Trap

When I was still a little girl I always used to watch Parent Trap. Before, it was just like any ordinary movie for me. Now, I already see the hidden message in it.
Parent Trap was made in 1998 and it is all about Identical twins Hallie and Annie who were separated at birth when their parents divorced. After the two meet at summer camp, they begin plotting to reunite their estranged parents. The Parent Trap (1998) is a remake of the 1961 family film of the same name. It was directed and co-written by Nancy Meyers, and produced and co-written by Charles Shyer. It starsDennis Quaid and Natasha Richardson as a couple who divorce soon after marrying, and Lindsay Lohan in a dual role as their twin daughters, who are accidentally reunited after being separated at birth. They did an amazing job in doing so because after everything that has happened to their parents, they still were able to reunite them and remarry them, in that case. Annie and Hallie were both affected and were harassed emotionally because one of them lives with their mom and the other one live with their dad. Annie did not have a father figure, while Hallie did not have a mother figure to guide them to a life that they deserve. They are both well off but they do not have the proper guidance through their teenage years and such. Hallie was brought up to be a down to earth kind of person, while Annie was brought up to be a very sophisticated girl. They were both experiencing entering teenage life not knowing that they have a twin. When they found out that they had a twin, they were both angry yet thankful at the same time. They were plotting their parents’ reunification in order for them to be together for the rest of their lives.
            What is the connection of this to divorce in the Philippines? The Philippines is a very religious country and a very overpopulated one, at that. This shows how divorce can completely change the lives of the kids and the couple. The couple was shown as a couple who were both having difficulties before and so they have decided to separate legally and for the rest of time. The dad found another woman and the mom stayed single. Both of their kids tried to rekindle their parents’ love for each other and so they plotted a plan to separate the other woman and their dad and making their dad meet their mom again in order to fall in love once more. At first, there was rejection but in the end they realized that they loved each other very much and that they want to be with each other for the rest of their lives.
            Annie and Hallie represents the kids who are going through their parents’ divorce. They have a certain longing to reunite their parents and it affects them emotionally.
            Should divorce be really implemented? Or should the Philippines stay the same way for the sake 
 of children who need their proper guidance for the future?


Sources:

Asian Correspondent's Take on Divorce

It is bound to be another one contentious bill, but let me just say that I myself is in favor of the bill. (It’s) very difficult to let the people who cannot continue to live together.
              
  I have concluded upon reading different reactions from people that divorce is an accepted form of freedom in the Philippines. The Gabriela party has proposed that this bill should be pro-choice not obliged to those who are unhappily married. It is indeed very difficult to continue to live together in an unhappy marriage. When having an unhappy marriage, the couple is clearly forced to be with each other and in the moment of lack of love and toleration, there is the presence of divorce. Divorce is such as strong statement, it legally and permanently breaks the bonds of a couple. It is a choice given to human beings as to which is makes human beings more free and problem-free.
The divorce bill is expected to attract stiff opposition from the ultra-conservative members of the Catholic Church, perhaps as vociferous as their criticism of the Reproductive Health Bill.
Saranggani Rep. Manny Pacquiao has taken a conservative stand on both bills, echoing the sentiments of the Catholic bishops. So far, only the Vatican City and the Philippines are left in the list of states that disallow or prohibit divorce. A third one, Malta, removed itself from the list after citizens voted for divorce in a referendum.
The House Speaker’s public statement of support for the divorce bill should result in speedy proceedings and serve as a signal to the Members of Congress he leads.

                Manny Pacquiao is opposed of the bills that are proposed against the beliefs of the Catholic Church. A lot of Filipinos are still opposed especially those who are very conservative and very much against going against the beliefs of the Catholic Church. As discussed in my previous post, the Philippines is known to be a very God loving country, and this truly affects the overall decision of the Church and of the congress. This makes it harder to legalize divorce because a lot of people are truly against the fact of going against marriage. Divorce is meant to be a choice for couples who are going through a tough marriage and who are keeping up a tough exterior but in reality, they are very weak and they have very strong sentiments against their own marriage. This will make it harder for those who have kids, though. Their lives will be more complicated and this will make them more rebellious and more angry. This will ruin a married life, and will ruin the lives of the people involved. Divorce can either make you or break you. It can break you in a way that it can manipulate you into getting a divorce with your spouse or it can make you by giving you a new life to live, starting from scratch.

                Divorce should be implemented in the Philippines, but there has to be limitations.
               

Sunday 26 June 2011

People Power

It’s time to move forward into the modern era and away from medieval times. It’s time to give women more 
protection, empowerment and a better chance of having a happier and more fulfilling married life.

                   It’s time to legalize divorce. Filipino women are fighting for this bill ever since the idea of freedom from abusive marriages occurred. In fact, the government is pushing through with almost legalizing the bill but something is stopping them from doing so, and this powerful authority is the Church. I, honestly, have nothing against the Church’s beliefs because I am a Christian. Born and raised to be God’s faithful servant, but this time I’m looking at life into a more positive note than moral hindrances. I am opening my eyes to the reality of abusive marriages, unfaithful spouses and reoccurring misunderstandings that often lead to fights and chaos on the household. More often than not, Filipinos usually are hindered from doing what they want because of this moral guidance from the Church. Again, I have nothing against the moral beliefs of the Church; I am just considering possibilities. Filipinos are jailed inside a cage that is really misleading as a human being. They say that these moral hindrances are the Church’s way of guiding the Filipino people into a better light, yes of course, we are living in a very democratic nation and guidance is highly needed, but look at this situation in a different angle. How can Filipinos possibly discover things that are not meant to be discovered (as the Church says so and so is the government, in some cases) if there are hindrances? Laws like no killing, no stealing and such are laws that should be implemented in the society and are meant to be so, but the Divorce Bill should also be considered by the Church because it may serve as guidance and betterment for the lives of the masses. It may not be as pricey as annulment but divorce may be more than annulment itself.

Let us not fool ourselves and turn a blind eye to the sad fact that many marriages in the Philippines are not successful and in most cases, the wives in these damaged marriages are still prisoners living in suffering, pain and sometimes in fear of their own lives.

            I honestly dream of a better society, an ideal one. The one that is free from hindrances to live life to the fullest, the one that breaks the traditional ways apart, and the one that is completely modernized. That is my opinion, per se, but different people have different opinions, modernized in a way that it is not scared to legalize laws that can be of help to the Filipino people. This is a very democratic country and the power is in the hands of the people living in it. I honestly think that people have the authority, not the government or the Church but the power relies on the people and the way they take in things like the Divorce Bill. 

Thursday 23 June 2011

Another angle to look upon divorce

The country's influential Catholic Church had thwarted all previous attempts, but the women pushing for this latest divorce legislation say prospects of it being accepted are better this time. ... Under the Philippines Family Code, only annulment restores a married couple to single status, allowing each to remarry. 
            The Philippine Catholic Church has been rejecting all kinds of propositions about divorce. Men usually are the ones who want divorce, but in the Philippines, it’s the women who want this bill to be legalized. This has been how they are ever since there has been a proposition about divorce. It is very unlikely because women usually think the other way around, which is forever and they usually believe in working things out. It makes me wonder how the women think nowadays. Maybe they’re traumatized? Maybe they’re scared? Maybe they are slapped by reality, reality that men are more liberated in a way that there is only little chance to find a man who can love unconditionally. It is unlikely to find a man who is faithful, who does not look at other women, and who does not abuse a relationship. Women are scared that they might be trapped in a marriage that is very abusive and very emotion consuming.
It's interesting that the Catholic church would oppose the legalization of divorce. Do they sincerely think that non-Catholics in the Philippines should be bound by Catholic doctrine? Perhaps American Catholics should ask their priests what they think about it — are the Catholic leaders in the Philippines wrong or not? Would the Catholic church support making divorce illegal in other places, like America? 
            One good point was raised in this forum which is should Catholics be bound by Catholic doctrine? Catholics should keep their values intact at the same time they should be living their lives the way they want it to be. Why is it that society dictates to us what to do? The Philippines is a Catholic country and is a very religious country which has been consistently using their values as a way of living their lives and they are greatly influenced by the Church.
It is ironic that the Roman Catholic prelates have a say in marriage, a practise which they abhor and do not practise. What do they really know about marriage? Are they in any position to have a say in the matter? Hypocrites!
            This is a very good point by a man named Manny Aquino in the forum. He said that people who work for the Church is a part of a calling and one of which is chastity. Chastity is not participating in the holy sacrament of matrimony. They do not know a thing about marriage. They do not know anything about how marriage works, so how can they dictate to people what should be happening and what should they do about their lives? They never had any chance to experience marriage problems that is why they do not have a say on this bill.
            The divorce bill should be legalized. I am for freedom and I am for pro-choice.

Wednesday 22 June 2011

Own Opinions


Source:http://www.fnf.org.ph/talakayan/liberal_topic.php?id=420
Lois Abigail’s Open Forum

Divorce? Im definitely say YES! Now a days kasi there are many filipinos who can't afford to go under annulment, let's say a couple is seperated for almost seven years and they have their own way of living or should I say they have their own family and they want to be legally seperated. But they can't afford the annulment process... So for me divorce should be legalize.

i strongly agree with divorce. Annulment has the similar end result i don't understand why some disagree or justify not to legalize it here in the Philippines.some people are against it for we are catholic country family oriented and marriage is sacred - that's bs. isn't it life is more sacred than marriage. if couples hurt each other and kids are nurtured with violence wives are abused cheated and battered. would you still stay with so called "marriage". we are entitled to be free and happy.

I am in favor of divorce bill since I am also longing to end my suffering of living alone due to my wife who institued our marriage to be ended since she in abroad and not planning to comeback here in our country. People who disagree this bill not to be approved dont understand whats like to be separated and cannot move freely to be maaried to another woman and deserve to be happy and for sure you blind and selfess. Hope you guys who disaggree this bill wont be approved wont expercience the same thing as what I have felt rightnow thank you and good day to all of you.

These strong opinions came from anonymous writers in Lois Abigail’s Open Forum about legalization in the Philippines. They said that the annulment process take a lot of time, and a lot of money. If there is a divorce bill, it is much easier and cheaper to separate from an abusive marriage.

            One of them said that he/she wanted to end his/her suffering from his recent marriage because he/she was not treated right. Those people who are not for divorce are simply being selfish to their own beliefs and their own wants. Every person deserves to be happy and every person deserves a second chance. Those people who disagree does not understand what its like having a terrible marriage and an excruciating separation.

           
            The other writer did say specifically that divorce is much like annulment also, annulment taken to the next level. Divorce is like the solution to all the fuss there is in the annulment process. Life and happiness and more sacred than marriage, and everyone is entitled to be free and happy.

            Divorce is an option, not an obligation.

Monday 20 June 2011

No to divorce


An SMS poll conducted during Sunday's ANC Harapan debate showed 3,331 votes to scrap the bill compared to 3,077 votes to pass the bill. A separate online poll showed 539 votes for the passage of the bill and 659 against.

                Harapan has discussed divorce bill and their critics won the poll about it. It shows that Filipinos do not want the divorce bill to be implemented in the society. They want to have a country that is pro-Christianity and anti-divorce. It is obvious that the Filipino community is not divorce friendly, but some of the Filipinos still voted for divorce to be legalized in the Philippines.
Critics of the bill won in the 2 polls with 52.46% of the vote compared to 47.54% supporting the bill. The results ran counter to a recent Social Weather Stations survey that showed 5 out of 10 Filipinos (50%) are now in favor of divorce, while 3 out of 10 (33%) are against.
The vote for anti divorce has been more than the opposition. This shows that a lot of Filipino people are still closed minded about divorce and its possible effects in the society and how it will greatly affect the Filipino people’s culture and efforts to be a Christian dominated country who hold firm on their beliefs as a Christian.
Novaliches Bishop Emeritus Teodoro Bacani said the bill is unconstitutional because the family is recognized by the State as “the foundation of the nation." He said marriage is sacred and is a gift from God.
                He was speaking for divorce and how unconstitutional it was because the family is called “foundation of the nation” and the core of every Filipino’s values. The Philippines have been known to be a Christian dominated country which is very much likely to be all bible hugging and God loving, but statistics show that some Filipino people voted for divorce, this only means that the Filipinos should not be generalized as such.
                Ang divorce ay laban na laban sa ating Constitution. It requires a lot of imagination para sabihin mong nakaka-strengthen ng solidarity ng family ang paghiwalayin mo ang magkasama at bigyan mo sila ng pagkakataong mag-asawa ulit,” he said.
                Divorce as it was discussed in the previous post, may strengthen Filipino people  to be independent and to chain away from their despair. This is opposed by the spokesperson saying that divorce does not strengthen a marriage because it simply breaks a couple who vowed to Christ apart.
He added: "Ilang babae kaya ang papayag sa harap ng altar ay magpakasal at sasabihin ng asawa nila, ‘Sa totoo lang, mamahalin kita hanggang divorce lang’? Palagay ko, wala."
                This will also affect the trust of the Filipino women. Women would not want to marry anymore. But isn’t it that if a person wants to marry the other person, divorce is simply out of the picture? Love beats divorce and I believe that it is possible to love more than to consider 
divorce as a part of one’s marriage.


http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/06/12/11/divorce-bill-sparks-debate
SOURCE

Saturday 18 June 2011

From the Maker's Point of View

"Why don't we provide these options nandyan na, dagdagan lang natin. It doesn't mean gamitin natin yun option because it happens to be there but it is available for couples for whom the marriage has failed, where the differences are so irreconcilable that it is irreparable, especially to the women because majority of those who apply are women."
            Another strong opinion has been said by Garbiela Representative Luzviminda Ilangan, A co-author and a co-maker or the Divorce Bill that was legalized just recently. She clearly states that the Philippines is very much ready for this bill. The Gabriela Party’s main focus is those women who are currently under an abusive marriage and who have no way out.
Women account for 61% of applicants, while 92% are Roman Catholic.         
This proves that women who are Catholic aim to settle for separation and most of them want to result to divorce. Divorce is not an obligation, but it is purely a necessity for people who need it. The Gabriela Party is considering legal grounds for Divorce.
The Filipino-style Divorce
            "Sa amin yung divorce bill Filipino-style is different from the Las Vegas-style.  Isang condition would be for couples who have been legally separated for at least 5 years and there is no more hope for reconciliation. Why not grant them divorce so they can move on and get married?"
The Filipino Divorce is different from legal separation of other countries, in the PH style of divorce, there should be 5 years separation from the spouse and there should be a valid reason why (sexual infidelity, abandonment, repeated violence, imprisonment). This has been the case for several couples in the Philippines and the Divorce Bill simply gives them the chance to live a better life and to attain freedom from their past marriage/s.
Reasons for Divorce
    
Filipino couples have three options to end their marriages: declaration of nullity of marriage, which recognizes that the marriage was void from the very start, or in case of minors, happened without permission, annulment, or legal separation, wherein couples can separate but cannot marry again.  To that, Ilagan says, divorce offers a cure.
Divorce is considered to be a cure not an obligation. It is merely a choice for couples who are going through a rough marriage. This is supposed to be a new light for the Philippines and this is supposed to serve as a choice for others. Everybody deserves a second chance, everyone deserves to have a good life, a new life and a better life.
    
"Studies have shown, even if divorce is available, many people still don't avail of it.  Only those who really need it and want to resolve their differences avail of it.”
People are usually go for their own choice and they are usually for their own interests and wants. Sometimes divorce is implemented and legalized but people do not avail of it. People do not use this to make their lives better, this simply makes their lives more tolerable and make their lives more meaningful.



Friday 17 June 2011

Pro-choice

One of the personalities in showbiz Director Joey Reyes apparently supports the Divorce Bill. His strong statement regarding this case is:

"Hindi ako naniniwala na kapag ni-legalize mo ang divorce na ang Pilipino magiging pariwara, burara at hindi bibigyang pahalaga ang pagpapakasal. I think ang bata na sobrang pinoprotektahan ay lalaking inutil. At ang kaisipan ng Pilipino ay malapit na sa pagiging inutil dahil sa dami ng hipokrisiya at [mga taong] nagmamaganda o nagmamalinis sa ating lipunan," he said.

He compared the Philippines to a little boy who is fully protected and he described it as “inutil” or stupid. He indirectly states that the Philippines, if it is too protected, may result to being stupid or simply being naïve about things. This will result to the Philippines' closed-mindedness and not being open to the realities of life. In one interview, he also said that:

He is pro divorce, "mainly because I believe that Filipinos should be given a chance to mature."

He believes that maturity is the key to Filipino's effectiveness and development as a country. He is pro-divorce and pro-choice as well. He strongly believes that it is most important for couples to separate rather than to keep pushing that their marriage is working even if it is not anymore. He also stated that:

"Kahit na nakalantad na ang katotohanan na kapag ang dalawang tao nagkamali sa kanilang pagsasama, hindi yun kasalanan. Tao sila kaya sila nagkakamali at kailangang mabigyan ng pagkakataon na maging maligaya muli,"

He believes that it is not at all sinful if the Filipinos make a mistake of marrying someone who is solely not who they are meant to be with. If sinning like lying or adultery is forgivable, why not divorce? Why can't divorce be as random as lying or stealing?

"Hindi ako naniniwala na porket tayo lang ang bansa na walang divorce dapat tayo makisunod sa uso. Hindi naman yun ang punto e. Ang punto e magtiwala naman kayo na may utak ang Pilipino. Magtiwala naman kayo na ang Pilipino mature enough to make decisions for themselves. At magtiwala tayo na ang lahat ng tao nagkakamali, pati mga tao sa simbahan."

He clearly states that the Church should trust the Filipinos and believe that they will not result to this Bill abruptly, Filipinos have the ability to think much like any other race in this world. The Filipino people should be given a choice and not hinder the, from being free as human beings to choose from what they believe should be done or not. If a person is already against divorce now, why can't he or she be against divorce even if it is legalized? Why can't they stick to what they believe in? The legalization of the divorce bill is for those people who long for freedom from their married life, not simply because there's a way, but because they chose to. The Filipinos should be given the light and the faith that there is hope and that there will be a way out to their marriage. Not an easy way out but an optional way out.

Thursday 16 June 2011

Juxtaposition of RH Bill and Divorce Bill

Is Divorce Bill worse than RH Bill?
            According to CBCP (Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines), the legalization of the Divorce bill is worse than the RH Bill itself. According to them, “If we compare the divorce and RH bills, divorce directly destroys what is good, and that is the marriage bond, while the RH bill does the same but indirectly,” said CBCP legal counsel Jo Imbong. They are clearly not for the Divorce bill and they think that it will truly affect the Philippines As I juxtapose the RH Bill and the Divorce Bill, I’d like to start off with a question. Are these bills really acts of destruction?
            The RH Bill legalizes contraceptives that is the reason why it was described as indirectly destroying what is so called “Catholic.” It goes through a medium where in people tend to think that it is not connected at all to the Church but it actually is. It prevents life and the Church is pro-life. It does not allow abortion, but it allows contraceptives which is probably the same. It is life being hindered by a certain thing, while divorce is a complete destruction of the holy sacrament of marriage. Sacraments are meant to be kept as holy and couples who undergo the sacrament of matrimony are obliged to stick with their spouses until the end of time. It does not matter what happens, the sacrament of matrimony makes it clear for everyone that couples are meant to last forever under any circumstances. A lot of people have been divorced and the Philippines is one of the countries who used to make divorce illegal. Now, it has already opened its eyes to the Divorce Bill, therefore, the Philippines has opened its eyes to the reality that divorce is a choice. RH Bill, as it has been discussed has been legalized in the country for more than a year now. It allows the use of condoms and it has allowed the use of other contraceptives as well like birth control pills and the like. For the Filipino Church, divorce bill is not a priority, it is solely an option for Filipinos and it is purely immoral, But for the Filipino people, it is not a priority but it is purely an option and it is not detrimental to the Filipino law, but it depends on the people if they want to result to divorce or not. This has been a probable outcome of the Filipino people being very much adept to the Western culture. The Filipinos has been consistently and constantly being colonized by the Americans regarding their ways and the way of living, If it’s okay for the other countries, why not here? Some people are for the RH Bill, while not being fully okay with the Divorce Bill. Some people are okay with the divorce bill, but not okay with the RH Bill. This is very much considerable by the government because this country is purely democratic. Democratic in a way that the government listens to the people more than it listens to the Church. 

Wednesday 15 June 2011

The Shocking News

Filipino Thinkers have debated about the implementation of the divorce bill. They said:
“Aside from the happy ending, which left the Philippines the only country without divorce, the story of Malta’s divorce referendum shares similarities with our own reproductive health (RH) debates:
both countries are last bastions of Catholicism: Malta in Europe, the Philippines in Asia; both countries are predominantly Catholic: 95% in Malta, 80% in the Philippines; and both battles are primarily between progressive Catholics and conservative bishops. And in both cases, the conservative bishops use fear mongering to keep their flock in line.”
The church is the one who wants to maintain the status quo and to preserve what has been taught to Christians for a very long time. Ever since Christianity started the Spaniards came about spreading the words of God and since then, the world has been trained to develop and their values and beliefs as believers of God. Christians believe that there is a superior being named God and they believe in the concept of reward and punishment. The country Malta and the Philippines are both Catholic countries and are the only countries that uphold the Christian values and beliefs intact. Malta has accepted divorce in their country and now, the Philippines have been setting certain laws that pertain directly to the Divorce Bill. Filipinos has been stereotyped as God fearing and bible loyal. This country is an 80 % Catholic country which means that it is dominated by Christians. The church does not want this image to vanish; the church simply wants to retain the Christian’s values as a person and for them to make the country a better place through Christian worship and living the word of God. Unexpectedly, the Filipinos just released a proposition to legalize the Divorce bill. This has been a controversial issue all throughout the world and still is becoming a huge phenomenon. Will the Philippines legalize divorce or not? This is the question that has been boggling my mind.

According to the recent Filipino Thinkers blog:                                  
“Yesterday, the pro-divorce movement won the referendum on divorce with a majority of 54%, ending a battle that has delayed the much-needed measure for decades. The victory came despite the constant political meddling and religious blackmail of the Catholic Church.
It has been proven that the Filipino’s voice is very eminent in the society. Majority wins, as cliché as it may sound, it is very much applicable to what has been happening in the country. Philippines is a very democratic country and its voice about Divorce is always heard. It is always heard to the point that Divorce is now a legal law that will make life easier for those couples that need to separate and to live a whole new life. Divorce, as anti-Catholic as it may possibly sound, it is true that the Philippines is a God-driven country but still going with their own secret wants. People are greedy by nature and they are, indeed a proven fact upon legalizing the Divorce Bill.


Monday 13 June 2011

Wrong Perceptions


                A previous attempt to legalize divorce in the Philippines was made in the year 2001-2004. And recently, yet again, divorce was discussed in the congress back in 2005. It stopped for a while but then it 2011, again, the study on legalization of such issue was revamped by the congress. Even though the Church does not support the government, divorce was always in the minds of the people. They have been, constantly thinking of it even though it was not fully allowed by the church. Divorce made a lot of lives better in the United States, and more complicated. There are two ways of looking at things, positively and negatively. Divorce may either be accepted by a community and they would look upon it as a new start or it may also be looked upon in a very negative light. The positive outlook belongs to the government, while the negative light is looked upon by the Church. As you all know, I am for divorce and yet I still constantly look at the side of the opposition. To better understand a side, one should look into the other side, as well. Contradictory takes make a lot of people who are for divorce more aware in the progress of this bill. In debates, to further support one’s idea, a person should look into its negative side.
“Preposterous law” “Anti-Catholicism” “not value oriented” are such strong words that were used to describe the Divorce bill by the Church. This may be used to tackle further the divorce bill. Preposterous means contrary to nature. It a way to disregard the status quo, it is going against “what is”. This law may be described as such but it is not going against nature, it is going against the Church and going with the will of the people. It cannot be described as such because the world does not revolve among the elderly, among the traditional members of society but it is purely democratic and the democracy is nature. If more than half of the Filipinos voted for divorce, it does not necessarily mean that divorce is going against nature; it is solely going against the Church. Next is “Anti-Catholicism” and “Not value oriented”. This solely means that it is against the Catholic beliefs; I do believe that it is against Catholicism but it does not necessarily mean that it is not value oriented. The Church has been engraving in our brains that Divorce will make the people not value oriented. It depends on the person if he or she will let go of his or her other values upon making the decision to divorce one’s spouse. Let us see different examples of values. Respectable, trustworthy, loyal and well-organized, a person can be all these and it does not solely connect to divorce. A person can engage in divorce but can still keep their values intact. A person can still be Catholic, even though he or she engaged in Divorce. It is not like everyone is not doing it in other countries; it is simply opening one’s mind to the idea of a new life and breaking away from all negativity and hurt. 

Sunday 12 June 2011

When is it too much already?

In the previous blog posts, I have written about the government and the Church’s take on the legalization of Divorce in the Philippines. I have not yet discussed on when to say if it is too much already? From a woman’s point of view, unfaithfulness and abuse is a number one trigger to divorce one’s husband. Abuse may come in three forms, physical, verbal or emotional. It may be physical from beating up a wife or a husband to actually murdering one’s spouse, to verbal; like shouting or uttering rude things to one’s spouse. Troubles may occur in any marriage, misunderstanding and unfaithfulness occurs probably because of the length of time being together or solely the attitude of a person. Once is always enough when it comes to abuse. No one has the right to abuse another person because it is a part of human rights that people should be given safety from abuse, and from danger. People should live with the security of being safe from danger. When it comes to relationships, abuse is already a trigger to lean towards separation or high precaution whenever both are together. Verbal abuse, meanwhile, leads to emotional abuse. An example of which is shouting, cursing and uttering rude and “below the belt” comments about one another. An emotional abuse, on the other hand, is when a person is affected emotionally because of wrong doing such as unfaithfulness, “cold treatment” or misunderstandings. All of these will result to further damage in a relationship and the like.
                Most of the relationships I know that ended abruptly are mainly because of unfaithfulness. Unfaithfulness to a spouse is a grave and immoral thing when it comes to dealing with the sacrament of matrimony. An example of a vow is:

I, ____, take you, ____, to be my (husband/wife). I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life. I, ____, take you, ____, for my lawful (husband/wife), to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part."

There is a presence of a “promise” to love each other and be faithful to each other. Breaking one’s vows means breaking the marriage that will eventually lead (in most cases) to divorce. Divorce does not have any boundaries when it comes to reasoning. Most couples lean towards divorce in order to make their lives better and make things a lot tolerable in their lives. It is much different when it comes to divorce with kids because there is an issue of custody. This makes the couple fight even more that will eventually lead to the signage of papers. Divorce is a contract between two people who are in dire need of separation from each other and the lives that they used to live in.

Sources:
Marriage Vows. Retrieved June 12,2011 from Wikipedia in http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marriage_vows#Traditional_Roman_Catholic_vows

Thursday 9 June 2011

Art. 15: The Civil Code, Contradictory or not?


          The Civil Code states that all Filipinos – where they may be in the world – are bound by Philippine laws on family rights and duties, status, condition, and legal capacity. This says that you can go out of the country and pretend like you are not married but you cannot pretend your whole life. If a person is married in the Philippines, he or she will be married for the rest of his or her life, not unless there will be a legal separation or right now what we call it annulment. The Civil Code solely contradicts the belief of the Divorce Bill. The Divorce Bill separates a couple fully and allows the parties to remarry and live a new life apart from their past, meanwhile, the Civil Code states that they can be annulment, but there can be no remarriages. This means that the Philippines has to choose one law to implement, because there can be no laws that contradicts each other for this will cause chaos and confusion. The issue on remarriages falls under Art. 26 paragraph 2 of the Family Code. This states that ART. 26. All marriages solemnized outside the Philippines in accordance with the laws in force in the country where they were solemnized, and valid there as such, shall also be valid in this country, except those prohibited under Articles 35(1), (4), (5) and (6), 36, 37 and 38. Basically, it says that marriages are supposed to be forever. It is under a holy sacrament and it falls under the beliefs of a true Christian. From a non-legal standpoint, as stated in the article, marriage is supposed to be between two people who swore under the oath of God to love and cherish one another whatever happens or as it is usually said “through thick and thin”. Marriage is supposed to last and couples are supposed to work things out between one another. For me, it is not at all contradicting because the Family Code is just another option. Divorce is also an option; it does not have to get along. Each of which is a solution and people are just given a choice. People are given their own free-will and married couples should have a choice whether or not to stay. The Divorce Bill may be pretty risky for it may give Filipinos the peace of mind that there is such thing or they may probably abuse it by keeping on remarrying every time they feel like remarrying, but it is, I believe; pro-choice. It may not fully be pro-God but at least there is a choice. In life, there are no more dos and dont’s when it comes to the matters of the heart, it is based on the choice of a person. The life we live now is very urban, we are in an ever changing world and we have yet to tackle different opportunities in life as we were deprived before to explore the realities of life. It is not detrimental to try, it is a step forward to being open-minded and accepting that life is all about practicality.

Source:
Divorce and annulment in the philippines [Web log message]. (2006, July 21). Retrieved from http://jlp-law.com/blog/divorce-annulment-philippines/

The Opposition


            The church always will have a say on the different laws that the government would like to implement especially when it comes to morality. From the RH Bill and this time, to the implementation of the Divorce Bill, they are voicing out very strong opposition statements. In a report by CBCPNews, Butuan Bishop Juan De Dios Pueblos said House Bill 1799 or the proposed divorce measure will lead to more immorality in Philippine society. According to him, this bill will lead to the degradation of Filipino values. He believes that the Philippines need a reality check and a slap about their religion. The Filipino people should uphold their values as Christians and they should be God-fearing as they were brought up to be. A lot has changed in the past years and the Church still cannot believe that this is happening, that the Filipinos are letting go of what they believe to be is immoral. The Church cannot accept fully the Filipino’s urge to become a liberated country and to follow what other countries have been doing. The Philippines now aims to break the status quo and to have a new outlook in life. Then again, divorce, for me, is pro-choice. It solely depends on the couple whether or not they will resort to it. It makes me wonder how some people think that it is purely letting go of Filipino values, the values will still be there, and it is just that Filipinos are ready for a new phase. In this country, we need change. Change for the betterment of how things are going in our everyday lives. Such strong comments like; Lipa Archbishop Ramon C. Arguelles called on the Filipino Catholic faithful not to follow the bad examples of "de-Christianizing" countries & “Kung sasabihin sa akin ‘kayo na lang ang natitira, Pilipinas, na walang divorce,’ Salamat sa Diyos! That is a distinction! I’m very proud of that!” They also stated that Divorce is a “social cancer” of the society. Once it is there, it will never go away and it has no remedy. The Church’s take on this issue is very negative and very pessimistic. They think that it is de-Christianizing; it is a social cancer and so on. They do not see its positive side and its future help to those who are in dire need of a legal separation. The church is very much against divorce and it fully contradicts what the Gabriela party was saying about it. They say that it should be implemented and that the Philippines need a bill that will set them free from negativity and hardship. This bill cuts half the Filipino population with their opinions. 45% say that this bill should be legalized, while 44 % says that this bill should not be legalized. This makes it harder for the legislation to legalize this law, but majority wins so we’ll just see where this bill will take us, Filipinos.

            The Filipino community is struggling whether or not to push through with the legalization of divorce. It has been said that the only solution to one’s problem comes from one’s heart. What is in the hearts of the Filipino people?

Source: 
Priests say divorce leads to immorality. (2011). ABS-CBN News , Retrieved from http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/06/06/11/priests-say-divorce-leads-immorality